summer 2022

HEY MUM XX

This is a very personal blog to start off my monthly blog posts, but I’m taking the LEAP!

My Mother passed away from Multiple Myeloma & Amyloidosis on Boxing Day 2021 and its been the hardest few months. In fact the last 2-3 years have been really hard with home caring, palliative care, private nursing, emergency hosital visits, so many tears. I kept a journal the last few years since mum was diagnosed. I wrote once in 2021, once in 2020, twice in 2019 and three times in 2018 when she was diagnosed. I wrote this a month after we found out.

14th May 2018

Hey Mum xx

Remember when you were 40 and you had that health kick, fitness stage?

I remember telling you, that you had man calves.We all had a bit of a laugh, so I thought? But I now understand and now I regret having ever said such mean things to you. I’m sorry.

You were so courageous to have run that half marathon, to get fit and healthy. I didnt realise that you were finally doing something for you alone and not for everyone else. Because thats what you had been doing for so long, sacrificing yourself for us. It is inspiring and uplifting. I should never have taken you for granted and I should never have spoken to you that way. I know now and I just wish I knew I better then. I’m sorry xx

Try to be conscious of what others are going through around you. Its not always about you. In knowing and learning this, I find that I get less agitated with other people. We all live our lives differently and really their lives don’t affect or shouldn’t affect how you live your own. An important lesson to learn.

"Women need real moments of solitude and self-reflection to balance out how much of ourselves we give away." - Barbara De Angelis

We also lost my grandmother last year too. Mother & Daughter lost within months of each other.